self love, self worth, Uncategorized

How I Stopped Feeling Shame Against My Body

A lot of you reading this follow my Instagram, fit.asamother. First of all, I love you guys and you have been the most supportive group and the reason I always feel encouraged.

I have changed a lot in the past year. When I first started my Instagram, I was timid and concerned with other people’s perception of me. I wanted to get healthy and in shape and posting about it made me feel vulnerable. I was sharing a part of myself that I had never opened up about before. But then I realized something; the more I shared my true journey and my realest feelings, the more I got positive responses and genuinely connected with people. This gave me the courage to continue to grow.

When I first started my Instagram, I told myself that I wouldn’t post booty pics because I didn’t want to be judged as 1). an insecure attention seeking female and 2). be objectified by men. I started working on my booty growth pretty heavily in December. I’ve always wanted a bigger booty, so why not get one? I started waking up earlier, working out longer, and changing my eating habits to see what I could accomplish.

I saw results fast and was so excited about my results, but never felt like I could share them because of how I would be perceived. I’m a wife, a mom, and a Christ follower….so how can I post a picture of my ass on the internet?

One day, I woke up and said “SCREW THIS.” I posted a picture and it felt so good. I’m not ashamed of my body. My body is strong. It has carried me through life and created a human being. TIME TO FREAKING CELEBRATE. I did what I wanted to do. Did I receive backlash? Oh hell yeah.

In the midst of all of the judgement, my sister-in-law had the perfect comment:

At a young age, I adopted the belief that abstinence was the only morally correct approach to relationships. I want to say first that I am not trying to change people’s belief on this, just sharing my own experience. This practice led me to believe that my natural sexual urges were impure even though I never acted on them. I started to feel shame. Lots of it. I lost self value, confidence, and belief in myself.

At this point in my life it is my mission to celebrate what I love about myself and others. I want women, especially moms, to know that you do not have to lose your identity in your children and husband. You are your own being with your own thoughts and emotions that are not dependent on others. You don’t have to feel ashamed of showing off your body because society tells you that you shouldn’t. You are allowed to have a life outside of your family. It doesn’t mean you love them less, it means that you have realized that you are also passionate and find joy in other things. Your family is not your identity, they are just part of your story. You are an individual and that should be celebrated.


The Moments That Define A Woman: A Thank You Letter.

It was every time I was told to change my clothes because I was showing too much skin.

Every time I tattooed something on my body and got disapproving comments.

Every time I got a piercing.

Every time someone made a comment about my shorts being too short.

Every time someone told me my butt was small. Or my breasts.

Being told to wear lipstick at work.

Being told to wear tight clothes to interviews.

The guys that told me they loved me when all they wanted was sex.

Being told how I should handle my pregnancy.

Men touching my bump and asking if I was married.

My friendliness being taken for being flirtatious.

Being blamed for sexual advances.

These moments defined who I was, caused me to not value my self worth. Thank you.

These moments have shown me that our society is broken. Women are expected to be quiet and polite. To cover up and be good wives and mothers. We are taught that we are our roles as a gender, not individuals.

I can not tell you how many times I have been put in uncomfortable situations and conversations and have been afraid to speak up to stop it. Not anymore.

This year, I decided to take back who I am. To be who I am without societal pressures, without other’s opinions.

“Other people’s opinion of you is none of your business” – Rachel Hollis.

I decided to take hold of my happiness.

Before you jump to conclusions, I believe most men are wonderful people. The good men in my life have helped me become stronger, more confident, and resilient.

What I challenge you to consider is this: who would you be if you weren’t under the societal pressure of conforming to what is normal?

When you look in the mirror, do you put makeup on for yourself? Are you wearing those tight jeans for yourself? Did you change out of the low cut top because YOU wanted to or because you weren’t sure how people would react?

My instinct is to question how I’m viewed. I don’t want to put makeup on, but what will my customers think of me? This year, every time that happens, I will fight to do what I WANT. If someone makes me uncomfortable, I will let them know. I deserve this.

I challenge you all to do the same.

#everydaysexism #effyourbeautystandards